"The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new."
-Socrates
You may not remember what you were doing ten years ago today. I have a hard time remembering what I was doing ten days ago, let lone years past. Heck, if you listen to Serial, you know how impossible it is to remember a day that was like any other. However, December 15, 2004 will always be a day I remember. Not because it's when I met the man of my dreams, figured out who I wanted to be, or anything big like that. Ten years ago I was leaving the only home I'd ever known and moving to a place I never pictured I would be long term.
"We're moving to Arkansas."
"What state is Arkansas in?" My ten-year-old brain couldn't imagine a city, let alone a state named Arkansas. It couldn't fathom a place that I would be so familiar with, it almost makes going back to Minnesota strange. None of that made sense to a kid that had known Minnesota and that was it. Still, moving seemed so far off. There were so many hurdles between the big announcement and actually packing up all our stuff and hitting the road. I brushed off my parents declaration that we would be moving to Arkansas as something that would surely fall through. After all, Minnesota was home. All our family, friends, church community, soccer teams, and memories were there.
Fast forward two years. I vividly remember coming home from camp to a for sale sign in my front yard. Six months later, we were going.
Looking back ten years ago, did I ever think I'd be here? Still in Little Rock? A Razorback alum? Working full time at an Advertising Agency?
Not in the slightest.
Did I think I'd get the heck out of dodge as soon as college hit?
Absolutely.
And yet, ten years have passed and here I am. God has a funny way of working things out, and in the end I am completely content with letting him continue to work things out in my life. After all, it hasn't been bad so far. The friendships I cultivated in high school carried me into college, where I met more amazing friends, had wonderful opportunities and found some direction and passion for my life. I found a team to cheer for (Go Hogs!) and a place that for once, ever since driving away from 16796 Hutchinson Dr. Lakeville, MN 55044, felt like home. And now I have a full time job, learning and soaking up all the new challenges and exciting things to come with being out of school, and establishing myself in a "new" city.
Would any of that have happened if ten years ago we didn't pack up and move away? Who can say except God. I will say though, that without that moment ten years ago, I would have missed out on some of what I know as the best moments of my life so far. Who knows where I would be in my faith? Those missions trips I was able to go on as a student in FSM helped shape who I am and all I believe in. Who would I call my best friends? I can't imagine a life apart from the friends I've made these past ten years. Has life been challenging? Every day. Have I missed Minnesota? Every minute. Am I thankful for the journey I've been on, though? Always.
God says he knows the plans he has for us. Every minute of every day he has planned. Nothing happens without him knowing exactly how he will work and redeem the situation. In Hebrews 6:19 it says that we have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. That God will faithfully do what he will do, regardless of my own attitude and plans. I will be the first to admit I have not loved every second of living in Arkansas. There are still so many things I miss about Minnesota. Do I know with utmost confidence though, that I am where I need to be? Yes.
Psalm 62:5-8 says "For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is from him. He is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be shaken. On God rests my salvation and my glory; my mighty rock, my refuge is God. Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us." My soul finds rest in God. Not because of where I am, but because no matter where I am, God is constant and his promises remain. I could be in Timbuktu and he would reassure me of the same. If anything, moving ten years ago taught me that regardless of where I am, my God will be with me and he will use my present place for his glory. While I may not see why Little Rock remains "home," I can't wait to look back ten years from now and reflect on where I was. Ten years is but a blink to God and ultimately I know this place, this earth, is not my home. So Little Rock, or Lakeville, or anywhere in between, my home is ultimately eternity with Christ.
So praise God in moving and change, in consistency, and in the places you never dreamed you would be. Because God only knows why you're there, and it is a beautiful thing to discover.
Until next time,
Jackie.
