"Ask not what your country can do for you-
ask what you can do for your country."
- John F. Kennedy
Community. One of the pastors at my church spoke on it the other day, and it was such an encouraging message, but also a really convicting message.
Lately I've been struggling through what my community looks like, what it should look like, and my role in shaping it. After visiting Guatemala and seeing genuine, authentic community in the local churches, it gave me a passion for seeing that happen in Little Rock. D Groups that are on fire for the Lord, for learning from and challenging each other, and caring for the community around them. I think I came back from that trip with this grand idea, and few ideas how to execute, which left me slightly frustrated, and slightly unsure about how to proceed.
In Guatemala, members of the church communities were invested because they truly cared about their neighbors and neighborhoods. I saw selfless attitudes, and genuine spirits while we learned alongside people from age 5 to age 85. They approached life with an "investing" attitude. However, I've seen lately that in American culture, it's easy to approach things with a consumer attitude. "What can this job offer me? What can I gain from this friendship? What does this D Group do for my relationship with the Lord and with others?" We are constantly bombarded by things telling us it's okay to be selfish, it's okay to "have it your way" and do things "because I'm worth it." Selfishness equals success in our world.
This consumer attitude in slowly eating into church culture. We approach church and our choosing of a church by if it has the right programs for me, a big group of people who are my age who I can be friends with, if the teaching speaks to me, if they sing the worship songs I like, if they offer coffee or not, and the list goes on. We have cultivated a culture of Christian consumers who simply have to switch churches or small groups if they're not feeling fulfilled and connected to find what they "need."
I get discouraged even typing those words, because I know that that has been my attitude time and time again toward church and small groups. "Well, I didn't really get much from the sermon, but it was fine." "No one talked to me at church today, so I don't know if I want to go back." "That D Group wasn't really filled with people I connect with, I'll just try another."
Instead of seeing Church as a place where God is calling us to sacrifice our ideas and our needs to love each other and connect on a real level, we see Church and D Groups as a box to check and some social activity to fulfill us. In the past two years of being back in Little Rock, I've switched D Groups 3 times. While there is a lot that went into those decisions, one of the core issues I dealt with each time was "I don't feel like this is fulfilling my needs enough for me to continue in it." I wasn't meeting the friends I thought I would. I wasn't doing the things I thought I should be doing. We weren't having discussions at the depth I deemed "worthy" of a small group. Again, the list goes on.
Do I go to D Group and see the people who are not connecting? Do I go to invest in others, to serve them, pray over their needs, and lay aside my thoughts and expectations to meet them at a real level? Am I willing to open up and show the ugly parts of me, even knowing that if people really knew my heart they might change their opinion of me? Is it just a box I check, or is it because I genuinely want to engage and love on my brothers and sisters in Christ? A relationship goes both ways- small groups only work if all members are willing to lay aside their "I" attitudes and look for ways to love and connect with each other.
Only the Lord can fulfill our deepest desires. No place, no church or small group is perfect. There are those that are a better "fit," where we feel the most like ourselves and can truly be used to the best of our abilities and passions, but if we are not willing to put the effort into changing our communities to what the Lord calls them to be, we have no right complaining about what they are. I can sit here and think "man I would love if my D Group did this, or if my church offered that," but if I don't even put forth the effort to change something, I can't complain that it's not done. I'm going to leave you all with the words from one of the Fellowship Pastors, Mark Henry, and the challenge to look outside your "I" thoughts, and see how you can start really shaping your church and community and investing, instead of being a consumer. I know I need to hear this the most.
“How are you doing at serving others in your life? Are you
giving yourself away or are you just taking in your relationships? Truthfully
for some of you, community is just about you and what other people can do for
you. It’s about other people being nicer to you, or more loving to you, or more
available to you, and if that’s how you’re going to pursue community I
guarantee you will never ever find it. You will suck the life out of every
relationship you’re involved in because you cannot experience authentic
community and relationship if you are a consumer. The very essence of the life
of Jesus itself is to give yourself away. Not to passively sit back and hope
that someone loves on you but to actively say I’m going to be that person. Who, out of my passionate relationship with Jesus, loves and serves others. I’m going
to be that person who seeks deeper and more authentic relationships with
people. I’m going to be that person that breathes life into others. I’m going
to be that person. See, real community is experienced when we serve others by
pouring ourselves out for their benefit, not ours. It’s what Jesus has done for
us.”
Until next time,
Jackie
